im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
