Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
