this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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