told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
