By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
