Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
