god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize
