Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I need a beard to bite.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
