VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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