Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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