I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
How's work?
Spinning.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
