The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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