But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i dont even know how to be here
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
