How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
