Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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