i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
