What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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