so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
