I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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