He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
