He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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