How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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