Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
