He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
as a side note pls kill me
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
