Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
