the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
