He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
