why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize