So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
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