New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize