So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
