Non-Jews are for practice
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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