im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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