I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize