just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
