So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize