he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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