oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
