On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I love you.
Bad choice
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