All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
