piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
