You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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