do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
He felt like a one man threesome
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
