Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
