good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
