I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
