Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize