I wanna bring you to show and tell
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
