thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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