We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
