they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
