I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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